10
Alright, let's start off with something country......well, -ish.
10) Song: Whiskey Glasses
Artist: Morgan Wallen
Year-End Position: 52
This is a song that, by all measures, I should not like anywhere near as much as I do. From its muddy production that can barely pass for country, the rough twang in Morgan Wallen's vocals that are really hard to listen to, and lyrics that juxtapose dumb drinking metaphors with a detail-less breakup, this song should drive me up the wall. And yet, for some reason...it just works. Why is that? Well, for one thing, while Morgan doesn't exactly have the most pleasant voice to listen to, he sells the anguish and desperation of just drowning his sorrows in booze just to forget the pain brought on by his girl leaving him. You just have to feel for the guy, really. Helping you feel for him are the lyrics, which actually have some well placed double meanings ("pour/poor me," "last call, I ain't drunk dialin' no more at 3AM," "Imma need some whiskey glasses, cuz I don't wanna see the truth"). The premise is pretty basic, as stated before, nothing more than a guy just wanting to get this girl off his mind with some alcoholic assistance, and yet the way it's presented is with this tone that goes for both upbeat and fun as well as dour and depressing at the same time. Yeah, it winds up a muddled and confusing mess, but that's really kinda the point. Situations like this are perplexing as hell and can throw you through a real loop. You wanna have all the fun you can, so you try to push through, and yet those thoughts still haunt you and attempt to hinder your good time as much as possible. It can be really jarring. This brings up to the production, where while the bass is a little sludgy, the subtle twang of the guitar and banjos set against the drum machines make the song sound a fun as possible while also as depressing as possible, and in the end, they land in a pretty decent middle spot. It's not the most pleasant sounding thing out there, but it works in spades for what it's going for. As someone who doesn't drink, all I can say is line 'em up line 'em up line 'em up line 'em up, knock 'em back knock 'em back knock 'em back knock 'em back.
9
Alright, now that I've gotten my least agreeable pick out of the way, time for one of the most agreeable. Ice cold take: Lizzo is amazing.
9) Song: Truth Hurts
Artist: Lizzo
Year-End Position: 13
Lizzo is one of the most charismatic acts in music we have today. Everything she does just exudes raw emotion, so much so that it's hard not to get sucked in by the sheer power of her writing, production and vocal delivery. The big hit she had this year was Truth Hurts, and my god, does it slap. The looping piano line is catchy and infectious, and set against the heavier trap snares, the song has momentum for days. On top of that, we have Lizzo herself, whose vocals, while not the greatest, just show how much confidence she has in every single ounce of her being and with every emotion she shows. From anger to sadness to relief to snarky wit and sarcasm, is there anything this woman can't do? Then there's the content, where Lizzo was once distraught by everything that her previous partner put her through, but now has not only moved on and found someone new, but has learned to love herself in the process, and that's exactly what this feels like. This is the exact type of song anyone can turn to if they're having a rough time, relationships or otherwise, and immediately feel better about themselves, which is always a good thing. This isn't Lizzo's best song as Juice definitely deserved better, and her current top 10 hit, Good As Hell, is leagues better than this one, but this is still a bop all the same, and if Lizzo is gonna be sticking around, I am more than okay with that. Good stuff.
8
Number one song of the year, one of the biggest songs of all time, and breaking Despacito and One Sweet Day's record for longest running #1 in the history of the Hot 100? Yep, I'd say it was deserved.
8) Song: Old Town Road (Remix)
Artist: Lil Nas X feat. Billy Ray Cyrus
Year-End Position: 1
Of all the songs to become popular not just from this year, but from this decade, I can't think of a song that has had this much buzz surrounding it. From the controversy arising from Billboard removing it from its country charts, to Lil Nas X coming out as gay, to Mr. Achy Breaky Heart hopping on the remix, not to mention the dozens of other remixes that exist of this song, and of course, the big one of this becoming the longest running number one song in Hot 100 history, there is nothing that became bigger than Old Town Road in all of the 2010s as a whole. And one listen to the song will tell you why because it is excellent. This country-trap fusion should be a disaster, and yet, the light banjos contrasted against the heavier trap skitters makes for this smoky atmosphere that fits the ol' western atmosphere it's going for like a glove, as does each of our performers with Lil Nas X giving a deeper voice with a southern accent that sounds great for his verse, dipping into his upper register for his hook, and Billy Ray utilizing his raspier voice for both his verse and hook, not to mention how amazing the harmonization of them both on the final chorus sounds. All of this for lyrics about wanting to free and live off the trail. This song truly is an anomaly, yet I like to think it wouldn't be this huge if it didn't have so many memorable moments, and for all the right reasons cuz this kinda really fucking rules.
7
Oh, hey, I can finally say this now: Sam Smith is heckin' amazing.
7) Song: Dancing With A Stranger
Artist: Sam Smith & Normani
Year-End Position: 14
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Up until this point, Sam Smith has always been an artist I've always considered good but not great. Sure, with the exception of Lay Me Down, which I still consider an emotional masterpiece, songs like Stay With Me and I'm Not The Only One are good, but they're not quite great. They got really close in 2017 with Too Good At Goodbyes, which in hindsight is way better than I remembered it being, but holy crap, did they come out swinging this year, and keep in mind, their other big hit, How Do You Sleep?, is only barely missing out on the honorable mentions. This, on the other hand, was a shoe-in for the list proper right from the get-go. The beat is lush and beautiful from its spacey synths, muted guitar licks, and a backbeat with a fairly nice pulse to it. It's almost like an out of body experience listening to it. Lyrically, this is a song detailing that while yes, Sam and Normani did break up with their respective partners (presumably each other in this instance), neither are prepared to deal with the severe loneliness that instantly follows after that level of separation, so they find themselves in the arms of a completely random bystander to numb the pain. It's not the best solution, but there's nothing else they can do, and they both sell that sort of resigned emotional exhaustion in absolute spades. Pretty much, just like with Whiskey Glasses, this is a song that knows how to balance being upbeat whilst also a pretty big downer at the same time, only in a much more palatable format. Sidenote: earlier this year, Sam Smith came out as nonbinary, hence my use of they/them pronouns, even when referring to just Sam. Can we have more openly nonbinary/trans/genderqueer/etc. artists with big hits, preferably as good or maybe even better than this? That would be awesome.
6
As someone who has anxiety......and that's all I need to say. Show it.
6) Song: breathin'
Artist: Ariana Grande
Year-End Position: 72
Yeah, let's be real: you can't talk about this song without mentioning anxiety at least in some form. That's entirely what this song is about and is exemplified in how it sounds. That's not without good reason, though, as anyone with anxiety, such as myself, can easily latch on to this, mostly because if there's any artist currently in the mainstream who knows what it's like to deal with something as debilitating as that, it would be Ariana. Seriously, over the past few years, from having one of her concerts shot up to losing her ex-BF Mac Miller (may he rest in peace) to even having her body touched inappropriately at Aretha Franklin's funeral of all places (may she also rest in peace), not to mention the media following her around everywhere and getting invasive of her personal space at every single turn, thus causing her to rush her last two albums to be within six months of each other, yeah, this girl needs some rest. Much like with how I regret not putting Yes Indeed on last year's worst list, I definitely regret not putting No Tears Left To Cry on last year's best list even more because that was a fantastic song where Ariana picks up the pieces and moves on with her life, and this is that, but even better. The production managing to be both sonically pleasing to the ears with the tense vibes and shimmering synths, Ariana conveying the feeling of pushing on even when everything around you is falling apart with her vocals being effective without even needing to full on belt, and the lyrics being clearly the most potent thing about it. Sometimes, when everything around you falls apart in what looks like an instant, suddenly things become disorienting, and even the tiniest thing can make you break down. Remembering to take a few deep breaths, though, and clear your mind any way you can without hurting yourself or others really does help a lot, and it's nice to see that put into song form. From the bottom of my heart, for making a song like this, Ariana, thank you. Next song.
5
About damn time this guy redeemed himself.
5) Song: God's Country
Artist: Blake Shelton
Year-End Position: 53
You know, it may be hard to believe, but there was a time when Blake Shelton was actually really good. I'm not just talking about in the early 2000s with songs like Some Beach, Austin, and The Baby, either, no, I even mean some of his early 2010s works like God Gave Me You and Honey Bee. Then it all turned to complete shit when he released that godawful Boys 'Round Here song in 2013, and ever since, things just haven't been the same. Sure, every now and again, you get a gem like I'll Name The Dogs or Lonely Tonight, but more often than not, you get outright trash like Neon Light or She's Got A Way With Words. Hell, even the song that came directly after this, Hell Right, is a steaming pile of complete and utter gunk. All that said, he managed to recapture that lightning in a bottle with this song. Hearkening back to the days of songs like Ol' Red, this song is epic. Those rougher acoustic guitars along with those big sounding drums and larger than life bells create this grandiose and epic feeling, almost like you're a gladiator preparing for the fight of your life. There's not much to this one in terms of content, pretty much your stereotypical song about working hard and partaking in working your fingers to the bone and how that impeccable work ethic will make you look all the better when it comes time to meet the almighty, but holy shit, everything about the backing instrumentation and Blake Shelton's more rugged, bombastic performance makes me just wanna go out, plow a field, and not stop until every single inch of it was full of corn, tomatoes, and other such fruits, vegetables and plants. Blake, I know you don't really make music as good as this anymore, but can you return to it, please? It'd sure be cool if you did.
4
Best new artist of the year, without question.
4) Song: Bury A Friend
Artist: Billie Eilish
Year-End Position: 73
Billie Eilish is a goddamn national treasure. Pretty much, she is the USA's response to Lorde, and I'll be damned if she isn't on or at least near her level. From songwriting that is far more mature than you would usually expect from those in her age range, production that alternates between weird and off-putting and quiet and lovely, and a voice that's delicate enough to sound aesthetically pleasing yet still dynamic enough to handle whatever mood the song calls for, everything about her music strikes gold almost each and every time. That's before we even get to Bury A Friend itself, though, which is on a whole 'nother league. Like, seriously, you just don't hear pop songs on the radio like this, and yet, she managed to sneak one in, and bless her for it because it is brilliant. The thumping percussion that leads into the multitracked vocals paired with a killer bass line makes for this eerie atmosphere that's hard to deny. And it's all that creepiness that works insanely well with how the lyrical content is presented with Billie confronting her demons and the voices in her head, which may or may not have to do with the death of a close friend, starting off initially scared and timid, afraid as hell of what's to come, but slowly but surely, not only does she rise above and conquer those demons, she actually becomes so in control that those demons in turn become scared of her, and she's able to treat their mere presence as some sort of fun little game, all of which is punctuated by those screams and screeching noises that, by the end, turn into nothing but small little whimpers. This is the type of music that you just don't see on the pop charts, and the fact that someone like her was able not only to break through with it, but make it big by making it her entire brand is just astounding as fuck. She would continue this with Bad Guy, which would become her biggest hit to date, even reaching the top spot on the Hot 100, but let's be real, while that song is good, this song is one of her best leaps and bounds. Plus this song doesn't have a misguided Justin Bieber remix. Just sayin'.
3
Oh, hi Posty.
3) Song: Circles
Artist: Post Malone
Year-End Position: 62
Well, it took long enough, but I can finally say with confidence that I enjoy Post Malone's music a lot. Funnily enough, for as bad as his start was, slowly but surely, he's been improving as an artist. Yes, songs like White Iverson and I Fall Apart still suck, but Better Now barely missed my best list last year, and save for an odd track or two out, I can without hesitation say that Hollywood's Bleeding is a really good album. And while I personally would've preferred the absolute rock slammer Take What You Want to be a bigger hit than it was (seriously, here's hoping that gains some real traction next year), this is a really good consolation prize. The best way to summarize this song would be to call it pleasantly frigid. It sounds really cold, and somehow, it still maintains this groove that persists throughout the song that's incredibly easy to vibe to with the blurry acoustics that have these airy effects surrounding them, thumping drums and a simple four-note electric guitar melody in the hook that just sounds blissful. Content-wise, this is a song about a relationship that has turned tumultuous. They fight, argue, cheat on each other, the works, but every single time they try to leave each other, in the end, they always wind up back together. Not for the sappy-ass "oh, I guess we were just meant to be together" reasoning, but for the simple fact that no matter how toxic the relationship gets, neither of them can stand the feeling of loneliness, thus they wind up back with each other only to keep the cycle going over and over again. It's frustrating, it's maddening, but they're both so emotionally spent and out of energy to give that they've just turned inexplicably blasé about the whole thing. And that's exactly how Post sings, so drained and defeated that he's just come to accept that this is how it's always gonna be no matter how much he tries to save a relationship that's so obviously on its last legs, and yeah, he sounds really good. Hell, even his quasi-yodeling kinda works here. So yeah, I guess you can consider me a Post Malone fan now. Who'd have ever thought?
2
Even without having seen the movie this is from, it didn't take long for me to connect with this one instantly. Then again, how could I not? It's Lady friggin' GaGa.
2) Song: Shallow
Artist: Lady GaGa & Bradley Cooper
Year-End Position: 19
For almost the entire first half of the year, this was set to be my number one. This is the song I kept coming back to time and time again, it was just that potent. And the funny thing is I haven't even seen A Star Is Born, and it'll probably be a while before I get around to actually sitting down and watching it, that is, if that happens at all. That's not to say that I have a lack of interest in doing so, I certainly do wanna see it, but I just haven't had the time between working two jobs and being so worn down and tired on my days off that all I wanna do is curl up in bed and either fiddle with my phone, play Super Mario Maker 2, or sleep like there's no tomorrow. However, even with all of that, something tells me that even if I never ever get around to watching A Star Is Born, I won't need to because this song is so goddamn powerful and hard hitting that it transcends the need for any context the movie could provide. Holy hell, what a song. Who would've thought the best country song of the year would come from Lady GaGa of all people? Starting off with the instrumentation, that delicate acoustic guitar line is the thing that initially grabs your heart before the staid piano chords and more abrasive electric guitars come in. And that drum build and explosion of sheer release in the second half is just plain exhilarating. And the vocal chemistry between GaGa and Bradley Cooper? Ah, just immaculate. Cooper handles the more comforting, kinda serious side of things where GaGa is more raw and emotional, and the harmonies between the two on the hook just sound flat out amazing. And don't even get me started on that vocal run that she does right before the final hook of the song. The way she twists and contorts those notes with such conviction makes it sound like her heart is about to explode right out of her chest. All of this for a song about a relationship that has taken its toll and isn't looking to bright for the future, but both partners are still holding out hope that things will eventually get better, even if the chances of that happening are quite faint. This is the type of soundtrack hit we need more of, and it easily would've secured the top of this list had it not been for a certain masterpiece garnering enough points to make the year-end, but before we get to that.........
Final set of honorable mentions for the 2010s.
Song: My Type
Artist: Saweetie
Year-End Position: 76
Admittedly, this one kinda snuck up on me, but hey, reworked beat from Freek-A-Leek (and is eons better than that song ever was) and Saweetie herself oozing charisma, yeah, this is a female sexual expression anthem from this year at its best. Well, except maybe for......
Song: Hot Girl Summer
Artist: Megan Thee Stallion feat. Nicki Minaj & Ty Dolla $ign
Year-End Position: 93
I mean, what really needs to be said here? Smooth beat with some summer vibes, Megan and Nicki at their best, and a great hook from Ty. Now if it was only released during, you know, summer, so it could've lasted a lot longer.
Song: Rumor
Artist: Lee Brice
Year-End Position: 81
Did I mention that country had a really good year? Cuz it did.
Song: Better
Artist: Khalid
Year-End Position: 20
Vibes
Song: Sunflower
Artist: Post Malone & Swae Lee
Year-End Position: 2
Even more vibes
Song: The Git Up
Artist: Blanco Brown
Year-End Position: 56
I don't care how "corporate" this feels. It's a good dance song with a loose beat that balances the twangy guitar and trap beat perfectly, and Blanco Brown is just having so much fun with it. How people are actually getting mad at this is beyond me.
Song: High Hopes
Artist: Panic! At The Disco
Year-End Position: 11
This one I can see why people hate, but I personally just have a blast listening to those triumphant horns, that explosive percussion, and Brendon Urie singing his lungs out with how genuinely grateful he is that he made it big.
Song: a lot
Artist: 21 Savage feat. J. Cole
Year-End Position: 42
Who could've seen something this insightful and introspective coming from 21 Savage of all people? Gee, if only there was a two word phrase I could use to describe how much maturity and growth he displays on this song.
And now......
1
I think you all knew what it would be before reading this.
1) Song: Baby Shark
Artist: Pinkfong
Year-End Position: 75
I mean, come on. This is just adorable. Who doesn't love a charming tale of a shark family hunting down and eating humans sung mostly by children over a bouncy dance be-okay, seriously, you all know my real number one is when the party's over.
1) Song: Baby Shark when the party's over
Artist: Pinkfong Billie Eilish
Year-End Position: 75 67
Seriously, how could it not be this? It may be a predictable as hell choice that will appear on and more than likely top several other lists, but if there was ever any song that deserved it, I can't think of any other song to point to than this. If Bury A Friend is a good example of her being able to pull off weird and off-putting, this is her showing how effortlessly she pulls off quiet and lovely because wow, this is an absolute heartbreaker right here. This is essentially the embodiment of a relationship coming to the most bitter of all ends. It's hard as hell to let go, and although you know it's for the best, just that alone isn't enough to dull the severe amount of sheer heartache even a little bit. Let's be real, we've all been there before. We have to let someone go when we realize they're not who we thought they were, and although we know it's for the best moving on from them, that is easier said than done. This song captures the whirlwind of emotions associated with the moment right before the moving on itself actually happens. From anger to sadness to regret to, ultimately, resigned acceptance. We're so worn down by all of these emotions that yeah, there's nowhere to go but up, but in those crucial hours, all we wanna do is lay in bed and bawl our eyes out until our tearducts run completely dry. And that's exactly what Billie sounds like on this song. So distraught from all of the turmoil that her voice constantly cracks, revealing her vulnerability bit by bit giving a tearful presentation that if you don't well up even a little bit after hearing all that, then I do not know how you can even call yourself human. Yes, this is a song that wallows in its misery, but unlike most songs in that vein, there is that wink and nod type of acknowledgement that things will get better and that it's always darkest before the dawn. It just so happens that right now, in the moment, things seem bleak and depressing as fuck. And the instrumentation mirrors that flawlessly with the layered vocals, the stripped back piano, and faint trails of wispy percussion in the background. And when I say the vocals are layered, I mean they are layered. That "call me back" part gets me each and every single time. Above all, though, this is my number one because of just how much care and effort went in to making something that could've just turned into another pissy breakup ballad (looking at you, Without Me and Someone You Loved), but instead decided more to aim for not only a tug on the heartstrings, but a complete and utter yanking of them. This is the type of song you go for when you know things will eventually look up, but for now, all you wanna do is turn all the lights off, curl up in bed, stare at your phone, and just let the waterworks flow. And with all that, yeah, best hit song of 2019, one of the best hits of the entire decade, and I see nothing but great things but Billie Eilish in the future. Lord knows she deserves all of them. I wanna thank everyone for sticking with me through this journey. It's been long and arduous, but hey, we made it through, and that's all that matters, and with that, Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy New-Year, Happy New-Decade, and take care.
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